Friday, October 26, 2007
Thursday, October 25, 2007
Baby dry your eyes
There's no need to cry
Cause I'll see you again
It might be a while
Before you understand
I'm just away down the river
A hundred miles or more
Crossing over Jordan
To the other shore
I'll be standing waiting
With all who've gone before
I'm just away down the river
A hundred miles or more
Now the pictures on the wall
Will help you to recall
They're not there
To make you sad
But to remember
All the good times we had
When it's time to leave
You're gonna feel the mountain breeze
And the snow will fill the stream
And carry you to me
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
then this is what we'd look like. Eli and I thought it would be fun to paint the 5 little pumpkins I bought in a bunch to look like the 5 of us. As it ended up, I had great fun doing this mostly by myself, although Eli stood nearby to offer his opinions as he thought I needed them. That's him with the red mouth and scary triangle teeth! And notice Jonathan's different-colored eyes and Ella's bow. We are getting excited for Halloween - we'll have a robot, a spider man, and a little ballerina!
Saturday, October 13, 2007
I'm reminded of a dream I had some months ago. Everything was the same except that Jonathan and I were getting married again (I'm not sure why). I knew in the dream that my dad was gone. We were rehearsing for the ceremony, although a large crowd was already there watching. We were in an old cathedral. During the rehearsal, the door to the cathedral opened loudly and sunlight streamed in. Before I could look back to see who was there the minister said something like, "Oh, good. I knew you'd come." It was my dad and he was wearing what he always wore (short-sleeved, botton-up plaid shirt with khakis) looking like his old, healthy self. He hugged me as I sobbed uncontrollably. He took me to a small, private room to console me. When I looked up he was gone and I was at a nurses station in a hospital. The nurse asked me what was wrong and I told her that my dad was gone and that I couldn't see him. She said, "What do you mean? He's all around you."
I believe that dream was either from my dad or from God. I need reminders that Dad is still all around me. He's in my children. He's in my nephews. He's in my brother. He's in me. It's funny how the things that used to bother me now bring me comfort - like the ice milk, and the way I have several projects going at once, none of which are finished, and how my fingers and toes look like his. I'm always saying things he used to (like "not only no, but probably not"). And I find myself singing some old gospel songs he used to sing (like "daddy sang bass, momma sang tenor"). Do I now like old gospel? Absolutely not. But I like that it reminds me of my dad.
Daddy sang bass,
Mama sang tenor.
Me and little brother would join right in there.
Cause singing seems to help a troubled soul.
One of these days and it won't be long,
I'll rejoin them in a song.
I'm gonna join the family circle at the Throne.
Oh, no the circle won't be broken.
By and by, Lord, by and by.
I can still hear Dad singing this. I never paid attention to the words of this song until recently. I take this as another sign that Dad is still near. After all these years, teasing him for loving this song, now it is comforting me. Singing does help a troubled soul. And one day I will rejoin Dad in a song. By and by, Lord, by and by.
Thursday, October 11, 2007
Gina tagged me to talk about my man, so here we go. By the way, this picture was taken back in July.
- 1. Who is my man? Jonathan
- 2. How long have we been together? About 14.5 years, but we've known each other for 18 years. Now I feel really old.
- 3. How long did we date? We dated 4 years and were engaged a year and a few months.
- 4. How old is he? 30
- 5. Who eats more? It used to be him. Now, I'm not so sure. I hate this question.
- 6. Who said "I love you" first? He did, very sweetly.
- 7. Who is taller? He is.
- 8. Who sings better? I do. (Thanks to the ACA Chorus, of course!)
- 9. Who is smarter? My IQ falls under what I call the "painfully average" category. Let's just say his is several, several points higher.
- 10. Who has more of a temper? His temper is worse but takes a little longer to bring out than mine.
- 11. Who does the laundry? I do. I call it "pile management."
- 12. Who takes out the trash? He does.
- 13. Who has sharper computer skills? He does.
- 14. Who sleeps on the right side? He does. Only because I'm closer to Ella's crib on the left. Soon it won't matter because we are FINALLY going to turn the playroom into her room.
- 15. Who pays bills? He has since Miles was born. He'd love for me to take this job back, but I don't plan on it.
- 16. Who mows the lawn? He does. Miles wants to.
- 17. Who cooks? I do sometimes. I'm trying to do better.
- 18. Who drives when we are together? He usually does.
- 19. Who pays when we are out together? He does.
- 20. Who is more stubborn? Good question. It's probably Miles. :)
- 21. Who is first to admit it when they are wrong? Jonathan
- 22. Who asked out who? I tricked him into going to homecoming with me.
- 23. Who kissed who first? He tricked me into asking him to kiss me.
- 24. Who is more sensitive? I wear my heart on my sleeve.
- 25. Who has more friends? For the most part, my friends are married to his friends, so it probably evens out.
- 26. Who has more siblings? He has 1 brother and 3 sisters and I have 1 really strange (but really great) brother.
- 27. Who wears the pants? In a lot of ways we share the pants, but he is the true leader of our little family.
Now, I will tag the three people who knew us back before we were us - Erika, Carrie B., and Rebecca H.
Monday, October 8, 2007
Friday, October 5, 2007
This song is by Nichole Nordeman and has really been speaking to me lately. It reminds me that God is always, always near. Even when we don't feel him. Even when we don't believe he's there. When we question. When we wonder. When we hurt. When we can't understand what is happening in our lives. When we are overcome by sorrow. When we are overcome by joy. When we are exhausted at caring for our children. When we look into the faces of our children and see Jesus. And how amazing it will be to one day be "headed home!" Then we will know. We will see the big picture. We will love without fear. We will be with Love. What a promise...
Pencil marks on a wall I wasn’t always this tall,
You scattered some monsters from beneath my bed,
You watched my team win, You watched my team lose,
You watched when my bicycle went down again.
And when I was weak unable to speak,
still I could call you by name,
and I said “Elbow healer, Superhero,
come if You can,” and You said “I Am.”
Only 16, life is so mean, what kind of curfew is at ?
You saw my mistakes, You watched my heart break
and heard when I swore I’d never love again
When I was weak, unable to speak,
still I could call You by name,
and I said “Heart-ache Healer, Secret-keeper,
be my Best Friend” and You said “I Am.”
You saw me wear white, by pale candlelight,
I said forever to what lies ahead
two kids and a dream, with kids that can scream
too much it might seem at
When I am weak, unable to speak,
still I will call You by name.
“Oh Shepherd, Savior, Pasture-maker,
hold on to my hand” and You said “I Am.”
The winds of change and circumstance blow in and all around us
so we find a foothold that’s familiar,
and bless the moments that we feel You nearer.
When life had begun I was woven and spun,
You let the angels dance around the throne, and who can say when,
But they’ll dance again, when I am free and finally headed home
I will be weak, unable to speak,
still I will call You by name,
“Creator, Maker, Life-sustainer,
Comforter, Healer, My Redeemer,
Lord and King, Beginning and End, I Am, yes, I Am.”