Thursday, October 25, 2007

I'm just away down the river...

This Alison Krauss song reminds me of the last time I cried in front of Dad. It was our first night home after our last UAB visit. Mom and Dad both slept all the way home while I drove and cried. Cried and drove. I think I almost believed that if we went the other way or took a wrong turn or ended up anywhere else, he would be well and would be able to stay. But Dad wanted to go home so he could go Home. As he lay in bed that night, I laid my head on his chest. He let me cry for a few minutes as he ran his fingers through my hair and then said, "Oh, baby this is nothing new." Of course it was new, I'd never lost him before. But I sort of knew what he meant. This song made it so clear to me when I heard it yesterday that when he said that he meant... I'm dying, we've known it deep down for a while, but I'm just going ahead of you, I'll wait for you, you know I love you and I know you love me, we've talked it all out, you'll make it, you can do this, now...let me go...

Baby dry your eyes
There's no need to cry
Cause I'll see you again
It might be a while
Before you understand

I'm just away down the river
A hundred miles or more
Crossing over Jordan
To the other shore
I'll be standing waiting
With all who've gone before
I'm just away down the river
A hundred miles or more

Now the pictures on the wall
Will help you to recall
They're not there
To make you sad
But to remember
All the good times we had


When it's time to leave
You're gonna feel the mountain breeze
And the snow will fill the stream
And carry you to me



tamara said...

Kristin, all I can really say is that I am so sorry for your pain. I can remember how close you all were as a family. And I know with certainty that his face will be the first face you see when you cross over. Have you read "90 Minutes in Heaven"? If not, it is a must read for you. A very different perspective on heaven and unlike anything I have ever read. Know that I am thinking about you!

Pick alittle talk alot cheep cheep cheep said...

Allison always says and sings it right.

Rebecca said...

I cannot imagine what you went through and are going through. So, I will not say I understand how you feel. I can only hope that one day I will have your same strength to get me through a difficult time. Please know that your thoughts are inspiration to others -including myself. You are in my prayers.

Erika said...

I know it is hard to think of it this way, but you guys are so blessed to be so close. Of course the flip side is, it makes it so much harder to lose someone.