Sunday, September 27, 2009

nap skipping

We let Ella skip her nap today. Crazy, I know. But we'd let the time slip and we were on our bed playing with her and then she happily ran off to play with her biggest brother. She didn't seem tired. We all went on a long walk, and yes, we did see the tree that has a face. And when we got home, it hit. We had one super cranky girl on our hands and it was only 5 pm.

By 7 she was absolutely miserable, as were we, so we both put her in her pajamas. Yes, it took the effort of two adults to undress and pj one very mad little girl. She's a tough one. I had her in my arms, paci already in her mouth (I know, I know) and we were searching for "blankie" all while she was crying "I want my daddy. daddy. I'm not tired. I'm too tired!" Jonathan grabbed her in a hug only a daddy can give, and in the time it took me to get her medicine (ear infection), she was just about totally asleep.

I took her back to her room, sat in the rocker, said her prayer with her, and started a song. She was out before the first line was sung. So for 20 minutes or so I held and rocked my sweet, sleeping girl. Usually I'm so desperate for time to do what I want that I read, pray, sing, go. But tonight I just sat. And rocked. And prayed. I loved feeling the weight of her in my arms. I loved how her little hand held on to my arm. I loved her snoring and paci noises (I know!). I missed being so small that someone can hold you that way. And I no longer regretted letting her skip that nap. Few are the chances to hold that one still, and fewer chances while she's quiet. I loved every minute of it.

Will Ella be skipping her nap tomorrow? Absolutely not. It was so worth it today, but on a Monday I've just got to make more responsible choices for the good of the entire family.


from last spring

And about that paci, she has it only at nap and bedtime - I've been telling her that when she turns 3, it's bye bye paci. Maybe we'll trade it in for something really cool.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

my home

I really don't believe in coincidences anymore. So, when Ella came up to me so sweetly yesterday morning and said, "you my home, mommy..." it had to be God. I mean, she's pretty brilliant *of course* but she had no way of knowing that the night before I was given this Word:

Lord, You have been our home since the beginning. Before the mountains were born and before You created the world, You are God.

You have always been, and you always will be.

Psalm 90:1-2


I very much needed a pick-me-up and Ella delivered just in time. I smiled at how in that moment God was saying to me I see you, I know you, I love you... here's a tiny glimpse of how I feel when you trust Me. Hold on to Me. Trust Me. Always. You are her home for now. I Am your Home for all time.

Monday, September 14, 2009

"We will see Poppa...

when we go home, tomorrow," Ella recently said upon seeing "Poppa's office tower," also known as the RSA tower where my dad worked. (7th floor, facing his fave Chris' Hotdogs!) We see the tower anytime we leave our house via the interstate. There it sits, hard to miss in the crowd, not unlike my tall dad. I've really been missing him an even extra amount lately, for various reasons, but mainly because sometimes a girl just needs her dad. I can't think it a coincidence then that Ella has been talking of him often lately, other than the usual office tower sightings. A few weeks ago, after her near daily recognition of the tower, she said "I wanna see 'im. I wanna see Poppa." Me, too baby girl.

So when she said, "We will see Poppa when we go home tomorrow," what I heard was "we will see Poppa when we go Home tomorrow!" And whether tomorrow turns out to be sooner or later, glory to God that on some tomorrow I will see my dad again.Poppa's Princess

Sunday, September 6, 2009