Thursday, March 10, 2011


here I am again. Writing about the issue of school. Again. After much prayer {fretting and general worry on my part}, the boys have been invited to enroll in the school we applied for. And while Jonathan and I both feel that God has brought us to this point, to this place, for a purpose, I still find myself feeling a bit torn. It's the loss of control that I find myself fearing. And then my wise husband reminds me that I have never truly been in control anyway, and that honestly, the feeling of wanting control does not come from God. And you know what? Fear isn't from Him either.

For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline. 2 Timothy 1:7

Now, we also believe that God did in fact call us to bring Elijah home for this season. This time has been challenging, precious, faith building, maturing, and a time of growth {for Elijah and me!} all at once. We have seen Elijah's confidence grow as he was able to learn in a way more suited to his needs. We tried to walk this path without medication for his ADD. It was hard, and for reasons more than academics, we prayerfully decided to try him on medicine. God never said we journey through this life on a straight path, did He?

So we are now feeling the leading to this place, this specific school, for our children. A place where Elijah can receive the attention he needs due to small class sizes, and where he can safely learn to cope with the challenges he faces due to his special way of thinking. Those with ADD obviously have academic challenges due to the inability to focus {particularly on what they find to be boring}, but there are also social and emotional issues. And while keeping him home feels so good and safe in that I can keep close watch over him, there will come a day when I can't be right there. He needs the chance to learn even now how to handle his challenges without me always right there to fix things. I think a large part of that is allowing him to be responsible to someone other than me for his academic learning.

And for all of the children, because Ella will follow in 2012, this school feels right as it sets as it's primary focus to come alongside us as we disciple the children for Christ. Academics serves as the means to that end. As I see it, and feel we've been led on this {crooked} path to this point, this sweet school is going to bless our children, our family, as it prepares them to grow in wisdom and in stature. In academics, but most importantly in the Lord.BlogBooster-The most productive way for mobile blogging. BlogBooster is a multi-service blog editor for iPhone, Android, WebOs and your desktop And just maybe God will also work through us to bless the school, and others through the school, as well.

So, we are still praying about this being the right choice. We feel that it is and that God's hand
has been all over this process. We have to let the school know our plans by April 1st. Will you pray along with us? And who knows? Even if this is the path for now, maybe one day God will have me bring them back home... He seems to want me to stick to that "Your Word is a lamp to my feet" idea. In following His direction, I have a bit of light for the next step, not a flood light for the next one hundred steps. He's wanting it to be day by day around here. Maybe one day I'll {finally} accept that.

Do not be afraid or discouraged, for the Lord will personally go ahead of you. He will be with you; he will neither fail you nor abandon you. Deuteronomy 31:8
This is what the Lord says— your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel: “I am the Lord your God, who teaches you what is good for you and leads you along the paths you should follow." Isaiah 48:17
Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I entrust my life. Psalm 143:8

Elijah and I in front of the Tanenbaum screen at the museum of fine arts. Taken a couple weeks ago. Where has my little boy gone?


Heidi said...

Kristin, we will be praying for you. God will lead you and the boys where He wants you. What a fun picture of you and Elijah. He is getting so tall.

carrie said...

I will keep you in my prayers as you seek His will for your family. I know you will seek Him and follow His leading while following your tiny light from the flashlight.