Two years ago today...

I started the long process of giving my dad back to God.

I just can't find the words to write this one myself, so I will use the words of others...

I know for certain that we never lose the people we love, even to death.

They continue to participate in every act, thought and decision we make.
Their love leaves an indelible imprint in our memories.
We find comfort in knowing that our lives have been enriched by having shared their love.

Leo Buscaglia

I would not exchange the sadness of being away from you for any imaginable delight in which you had no part.

Elizabeth Barrett Browning

When you are sorrowful look again in your heart,
and you shall see that in truth
you are weeping for that which has been your delight.

Kahlil Gibran

I thank my God every time I remember you... Philippians 1:3

And this is what I long to see...

For my birthday, Anita gave me this picture. It is my dad holding my daughter. She created this image by using a picture she had taken of Dad holding Miles as a baby and one of Ella's newborn pictures. I am so grateful for this gift, because otherwise I never could have been able to see this. When she gave it to me, I had an overwhelming feeling that Dad really did cradle Ella at some point, somehow. One day I will see him with my boys again and with Ella for the first time.

How I long to be in his arms again, feeling small and safe...

And the long process of giving my dad back to God? It continues...